When You Can't Hide Your Emotions: Taking It All Too Hard By Genesis

Right now things are still in shambles and though I don't show it, it's starting to take it's toll on me mentally and emotionally. Financial and family issues are digging deep into me like a dagger in my guts. The last few entries in my blog are all about the problems that I've been dealing and right now, things are getting more complicated. Back then, when bad things happen and it all falls apart, I was a good loser and took it in stride, but now I feel that I can't do that anymore, especially now that there are too many things at stake and wrench in the machine can really have grave consequences. People say that I exaggerate when I get like this, but when I feel that, I've lost a lot, I can't take it anymore and consoling won't help like that Genesis song "Taking It All Too Hard".

For me, the song has a deep meaning because it reminds me of times when thing fell apart and I was left hurting from it. I've had a lot of losses in my life and they really hurt me even today. I can't go on seeing things fall apart and just accept it only to keep experiencing the same thing again and again. When people say that it's no big deal, well it is to me. It stinks when you try so hard and come up short and you wanted to succeed so bad not just for yourself, but for the people closest to you which is why I take it really hard.

Face with the same problem once again is like confronting a ghost from the past which is making me angry. I don't want to go through this again and whoever is making me go through this (I don't know who and I don't care)has some sick sense of humor. I hope I can find a solution to this predicament soon. If I don't, I feel that I have not learned my lesson and once again find myself victimized. To sum it up, I'm really gonna take it hard if that happens to this situation which I pray will not. I know that life isn't fair, but don't make it any more unfair than it already is.

Blaming Is Useless: No One Is To Blame By Howard Jones

I didn't sleep well last night because I was still thinking about my financial predicament. Whether at work or at home, I'm face with the problem day in, day out: Money. As I have written in my previous entries, I don't care much about getting rich because all I want is to earn enough for excercise, martial arts and meeting the needs of my parents and the costs in the house. Sadly, this situation has left me scratching my head on what to do because once again, we're short and I really mean short. Still,as much as it annoys me, I don't blow up on anybody because I agree with Howard Jones's song: No One Is To Blame.

Although the song, is about a ruined relationship, I believe this song can relate to anyone who is experiencing one bad situation after another. Like the song, there are things that you can do that's within your power but can't because of the emotional effect that bad developments often bring to a person. When you get emotionally overwhelmed and everything falls apart,you feel rage boiling inside you and you want to lash out at something or someone, but the reality is that it won't solve anything and blaming others is pointless. When the rage is gone, the strength just leaves your limbs and you slump to where ever your body falls. Even if there is someone to blame, it won't make things right, though I wish those who caused it should face up to what they did.

Right now I don't what to do at this point because there are too many things that need attention to financially and right my hands are tied up. Coming up with a plan is going to be hard to get through these last few days, let alone till the 15th. Right now another development has arisen that's really annoying me. I just hope the Almighty have mercy not just on me, but on all of us at this point. I'll do what I can and I hope that something will turn up.

Don't Want To Be A Cartoon Casualty: You Can Call Me All By Paul Simon

Man, I don't like what's happening lately. I feel that I'm repeating past events over and over again. The places and people have been rearranged, but I feel that I'm in the same situation once again. I fear that I'm living my life in a sick movie script where I'm playing the same character and the same skit with just a few re-assignment of character roles of the people around me. The reason I hate and fear this is because it proves that I haven't learned anything from the past and am doomed to repeat which is becoming more and more evident everyday. When I listen to Paul Simon's song "You Can Call Me Al", it reminds me of that awful fear that things in my life won't change.

I don't claim to have an exact interpretation of the song but there are a lot of parts in the lyrics that describes this fear that I have inside of me. I can really relate with the first part of the song about not wanting to be a cartoon in a cartoon graveyard which I too fear. At times when I was at my weakest, I found myself relying too much on others hoping that they have the magic solution, but alas, they don't. At the moment, it's been one problem after another, not only for me, but also my family as well and I don't find it amusing at all! This is one cartoon that has no humor and it it claims to have any, it's in bad taste!!

Right now the house is in an uproar because of plumbing problems which is one hell of a situation to come home to. Right now tempers are high and pockets are empty which is sadly part of this sick cycle. I don't know if there are people who find this funny and if they do, they are sick people indeed. If the Almighty, is watching and listening, please help me find a way to solve this problem and break this cycle. I know it's all up to me, but can you atleast help me make a stand because I don't want to go through this again.

I'm Sinking Song: I'm Going Down By Bruce Springsteen

Because of what's happening in my life lately, my weekend was spent in apprehension as to what will happen next. It's bad enough that I have to ask for money so I can go to work, now I find out that the well is gone dry again. Man, I hate this situation because it reminds me of the I got humiliated during a family dinner and it still smarts whenever I remember the experience. All my life, I dread getting into precarious situations in any parts of my life. Right now I hear Bruce Springsteen singing "I'm Going Down" which literally describes my current plight.

The song describes a good relationship going bad. At first things are good between him and his partner, then things change as she starts growing cold towards him. This leads to him feeling down due to such harsh treatment. In my case, though it's not about a reationship, nevertheless, certain developments have caused me to feel "down" as well. Right now emotionally and mentally, I'm going down.

This is isn't the first time this happened, infact, this is the second and I'm not the only getting affected by this sordid development. Sometimes I wonder why those who toil till they drop are the ones who are the victim of such cruel twists of fate. At times like these, I think of Bergson's Shipwreck Theory and I also pray for a solution to this mess. I hope I see the light out of this tunnel very soon cause it's really giving me tensions. At times, like these, I hope the Good Lord guides me to something better because there's gotta be more to life than this.

Up And Down Mood Swings: I Go To Extremes By Billy Joel

Boy, I sure am coming down with a bad case of mood swings. One minute, I'm happy as a clam, the next minute, I'm down in the dumps. The problem is that there are more down moodswings than up and the news that I have learned last Friday, really put me on the downside. I would be resting comfortably this weekend, but this news is once again pumping me with paranoia. I heard of good times and bad times, but I have to admit this is getting rediculous and it' not doing my health any good. The song "I Go To Extremes" by Billy Joel pretty much sums up these mood swings.

I can relate very much with the message of this song because I've dealt with extreme emotion all my life. From report cards in school to employment reports at work, it's like a continuous emotional rollercoaster. Everytime, I feel happy, something happens that puts me down in the dumps. Just like my emotions, this song really pumps up the volume. Billy really plays a mean piano in this song which is really very hiper. He really described me in a nutshell with this song when it comes to mood swings.

Right now I'm trying to get things organized which means I'm preparing for the worst. I'm at my most apprehensive mood right now. The reason for this is because I don't know what to expect from this situation that developed. I pray that nothing bad will happen because lately, there's too much bad and too little good. I hope things work out well in the end regarding this situation.

Funny Billy Crystal Song/Video: Marvelous By Billy Crystal

Billy Crystal is for me, one of the funniest comedians that I have ever seen. His hostings of the Oscar and Grammy Awards never fail to make me laughs. Infact, everytime he cracks a joke, it really sends falling to the floor gasping for breath in between howls of laughter. From the first time, I saw him in the sitcom Soap to the present, he never fails to tickle my funny bone and that's no understatement. One of the funniest times I saw him during my high school days, was a song that always reminds me of the fast times of my decade laced with a little humor called "Marvelous".

The song was based on his S.N.L. character named Fernando (my surname) who can be described as a womanizer trying to score in a dance club and uses the word "Marvelous" to score. You can also say that his character is very vain in his attempts to meet women. Instead, he gets into all sorts of hilarious situation, the funniest for me was when he was talking to a girl when her large boyfriend comes in, prompting him to make a quit exit. Other funny parts of the video are his spoofs of Grace Jones, Prince, Tina Turner and other celebrities.

Time hasn't slowed down Billy Crystal. He's still very funny and his jokes always hit the mark with the audience. Whether it's movie, hosting an event, a guest appearance on a talk show or television series, he always makes me laugh. I hope he keeps it up, especially now when there's very little to smile about. To sum it all up: YOU ARE MARVELOUS!!!!

The Truth Is The Truth: Any Major Dude By Steely Dan

You know right now, I'm just recovering from an illness so hitting me with bad news is a sure knockdown. At this point of my life, I feel as vurnarable as a cube of ice in a furnace at the highest temperatures set. At times when I think things aren't going to get worse, they do. Still, you can't deny what's happening and even if it hurts, you have to face up to it. I guess that's what the band Steely Dan meant in the song "Any Major Dude".

Right now, if it's not one bad thing that I'm dealing with, it's another. Although people try to show sympathy to your plight, it can't hide the reality of the situation. Even if you suger-coat, the truth, it will still be the same and you have to accept it. Right now things are tough and getting tougher and now one will tell you otherwise. You can run from it, but eventually you're going to have to deal with it. I guess I'm at that point where the demon is at my door.

There is a a bright side to this song where it tells you that in the morning the demon won't be there. I really hope what he said that world that breaks apart will come together again because I have seen my world come apart one too many times and I can't take another painful process. I guess like the songs says, it's all up to me to figure things out. I just hope this time around, I make the right decision.

Love Isn't Silly: Silly Love Songs By Paul MaCartney And Wings

Whether it's done by a new wave, techno, hip-hop, country, rock or even metal group, one thing for sure, the 80's were so full of love songs. While some have happy endings and some sad, others talk about getting by after it's over. It just goes to show how universal a theme love can be and no matter what band performs it, it's a sure thing that there's an audience that will listen to it. No matter how deep or shallow, the song will always have a following if love is the main theme. That's what comes to mind when I listen to "Silly Love Songs" by Paul MaCartney And Wings.

Just like any other song regarding a topic, it describes what love is, how it blossoms and it's effect on the individual. There are even parts of the song that describes one's reluctance to talk about the one that he or she loves which is very true. In end, we all end up saying that all-important three word sentence: I Love You. What I like about the song musically is the duet between Paul and his wife, Linda and the horns really blow you away. To sum it all up, this song really sums up all the sings that individual love songs try to convey.

What's my view of silly love songs? Well love makes the world go round and songs like these are proof of that. I have to admit there are times when I feel like pausing whenever I hear a good love song. There's nothing wrong with love songs and although I listen to more agressive music, songs like these are cool to listen to time to time. If it's feel right, there's nothing wrong with that and nothing to be ashamed of in my book and that's that.

Another Stigma/Cheaters Song: Shame By The Motels

If I remember right, some of my entries have dealt with topics like cheating on one's mate like "What if I Had Been The One" and the stigma of making a mistake like "Joey". As I have written before, once you've been caught, it is so hard to make amends for doing such acts. Although, I am not saying it's impossible to redeem yourself, but it's going to take a while before people look at you the same way again. It's like someone hung the scarlet letter on your neck and you wind up being shunned by society. I get reminded of that when I listen to the Motels' song "Shame".

Whenever I listen to this song, I feel like I'm drinking whiskey in a bar during the 1930s. Just like the Allan Parsons Project's "Don't Answer Me", this song has that same effect. Anyway, like the song, whenever we get caught making a mistake, it really strips us of our dignity and we have nothing to say in our defense. We regretfully wish that we can turn back time but sadly we can't and must face up to our mistakes. To sum it up, that's what it feels to get caught red-handed.

I guess that's why I don't find comedy shows like "Friends" or "Sex In The City" funny anymore. It's not that I don't have a sense of humor, it's just that I really hate it when I see characters on tv do blantantly cruel things and look cool doing it. The fact that they get away with it and even justify it really made me stop watching the boob tube. In the end, we all have to face up to our mistakes. When ask why, the answer is because it's the right thing to do.

Stigma Song: Joey By Concrete Blonde

From my early childhood to the present, one of my biggest fears was falling down and finding myself once again in the gutter. During my first taste of the real world, I made some bad choices that landed me in very miserable situations where people looked down and criticized me so much, I wanted to run and hide. This happened not only once but twice with the second lasting longer which really made me so bitter that I thought there was no light at the tunnel. Even though I was able to get through both experiences, it really scarred me emotionally. I guess even though the song "Joey" by Concrete Blonde reminds me of those two terrible ordeals, at the same time, it helped comfort me like a lot of 24k songs did.

From what I know, the song is about an alcholic who's having difficulty with his cravings which results in conflict with people who care about him. The hard part about having an addiction or even making a mistake is that it marks you for long time and in some cases for life. Even those who are making progress with their alcoholism or other problems often find it difficult to shake the negative image brought about by their vices or weaknesses. Sometimes even though you've earned your redemption and your friends and family say it's allright, you sometimes feel it's not. Bear in mind though, that if you really want to break the habit, you can and redemption though hard, is possible.

As I mentioned in my first paragraph, I've had my share of mistakes and it wasn't about alcohol, but for me it was enough to get an earful of criticism from everyone I know. I couldn't blame because they were right and the worst part of it all is that I kept making the same decisions that got me to that point and even now, I still have that bad habit. Nowadays, I tend to be very careful of deciding what it is I want to do because at this point in life, it not only affects me but the people around me. People tell not to dwell in the past, but I can't help it because it terrifies me that I might repeat it again if I'm not careful. For the sake of myself and my family, day and night I pray that not to let it happen again.

The Cheaters' Song: What If I Had Been The One By 38 Special

Although it's on a late schedule, sometimes I watch the reality show Cheaters where clients hire private detectives to spy on their spouces to see if they are cheating on them and if they are, they get exposed on National T.V. for their infidelity which is very embarassing. If there's one thing I learned from this program is that if you get caught, face up to the consequences of your actions. Nobody likes being cheated on because it hurts when you care for someone and they do that to you in return. When a person is scorned, you can bet that there'll be hell to pay and that's no understatement. Watching that song reminds me of the song "What If I Had Been The One" by 38 Special.

Like the song, the video illustrates how infidelity can destroy a relationship and the terrible sequence of events that it triggers in it's aftermath. An abandoned bride that leads to her shooting the culprits and zooming away in her car at the end of the video. I have to admit I don't blame anybody for flying off the handle when they find that they are being cheated on by their spouses. Even if they did something wrong, people forget the age-old lesson: two wrongs don't make a right. The only thing I like about the song were the horses running through the field and though it's a ballad, it's still packs a punch.

If you look at the romance drama movies during the '80s in the Philippines, it all deals with love triangles and what pisses me off is the fact that a lot of times, the cheaters get away with it. What's even worse is that the victim is left forlorn and made to blame for the whole situation. Going back to the song, like all 38 Special songs (which I will be writing a lot in this blog), it's a good country rock song that still kicks butt. Songs by this band really rock and I never tire of hearing them. As for the song's message, please remember the following: Cheaters never win and two wrongs don't make a right.

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The Scooter/Mod Song: Good Thing By Fine Young Cannibals

When you say the word "Vespa" and the faces of my three older brothers would suddenly light up with delight. The reason for this is because they're scooter fanatics. The Vespas that the first two have really make heads turn and when it comes to a road trip, they won't hesitate to don their gear and head for the open road with their group. Although I don't share their love for scooters, I have to admit when I see them on their scooters, I get a bit envious sometimes because of that look of freedom that they have on their faces especially when they go on a road trip. And when I hear the word scooter or Vespa, I sometimes request the song "Good Thing" by the group the Fine Young Cannibals.

Apart from the catchy tune, what attracted me to the song was the music video which features the band hanging out with a British scooter group. There were different scooters of that were customized to suit the rider's personality. If I remember right these scooter groups were called Mods and like an American biker, they treasure their scooters in pretty much the same way. Although the song talks about romance or a woman, I guess riding in a well cared Vespa with your friends is also a good thing. In my opinion, it's a better thing.

Though I'm a walking man, I have to admit seeing people on vintage bikes or scooters like these, it make me feel good. My mother doesn't understand what my brothers get out of riding their scooters because she's scared of them. What she doesn't understand is when you ride on the open road, you get feeling of freedom that can only be felt when you take a journey as you discover new things about different places and about yourself in the process. It the end, it can all be summed up in one thing: Freedom. If that isn't a good thing, I don't what is.

Not Tonight: Not Gonna Let It Bother Me Tonight By Atlanta Rythm Section

Man, not a day goes by when I don't get reminded of all the problems that are happening today.  Everyone from all over the world is feeling the pressure. Whether it is high oil prices, job cuts/unemployment, price increase, etc., no matter where you look, there's always something to remind you.  Sometimes thinking about these problems really starts to bear down on you that you just want to ignore them.  With all the bad news that you read, hear and see, the song "I'm Not Gonna Let It Bother Me Tonight" by Atlanta Rythm Section really sums up what I feel when I don't want to let it get to me.The song really describes today's political and economic situation.  With all the problems stated in the first paragraph, I wouldn't be surprised that there is such a newspaper called the Daily Blues.  Bad guys winning the war on terror as people want to give up;  resources are now dwindling causing a shortage in food; corruption are all that you see day in and day out not to mention natural calamities.  You would be lucky if some really good news got printed which is now becoming a rarity.  I can a relate with the singer when he said it might drive you to suicide because it can if it gets to you.The question is what do we do about it?  Not a day goes by when I worry if we do have enough and yet I wonder about other people who are in more difficult situations than we are in.  I'll toughen it out and hope that I find a way to make it ends meet is what I'm trying to do right now because I don't want to give up to these adversities.  It gets harder everyday, but we find ways to cope because we won't let this beat us.  Tonight, however, I'll just chill and relax because I don't want to let it get to me which will ruin my weekend and that I want to make the most of it.

Favorite Hangout/Gimmick Time Song: And We Danced By The Hooters

Man, not only am I beat, I'm also broke.  Right now I wish I was 23 yrs. younger.  Back then, there was always something to look forward to From Friday evenings to Sunday mornings.  It was either the five of us would go to movie or have a small drinking party either at our house or at a friend's.  Sometimes, we would just gather around and have a few beers by ourselves and laugh the night away.  Everytime those memories enter my head, we wish someone would play the song "And We Danced" by The Hooters.When I about this song, it brings to mind things only the young can enjoy: partying and meeting your buddies at your favorite hangout.  Although it's more about having a crush about someone, it's also about the things that happen during a party or at a favorite hang-out.  In the video, it's about a drive-in and people searching for something or somone in that place which is always what happens when kids are on a night out on the town.  So many things happening at once, if you look closely enough, everyone has a story to tell as they try to enjoy the night.  My only critique about the video is that I don't understand why they have to tie somebody up and stuff them inside the trunk of the car.When I hear this song, it reminds how empty my weekends are compared to to 23 years ago.  Most of my time is spent on meeting the needs of work and home.  It just struck me lately that I haven't had any personal time for myself.  I know it sounds childish for a guy my age, but I wish I could relive those good times again with all my brothers and my friends at a favorite hang-out.  I guess the stress is getting to me and I really needs some down time with the people I know and love.

A Child's Plea For Help: Luka By Suzanne Vega

When I was growing up in the 80's, new wave, techno and hiphop were the most popular music on the air waves. It was a very carefree period and although people seemed shallow, they were just living their lives to the fullest. That's why I was surprised by this song that came out when I was in third highschool. This song, in my view, was one of a kind because it had a more darker theme than the usual high school tunes that I hear over and over again. The song was called "Luka" by Suzanne Vega from her Solitude Standing album.

The song introduces listeners to a child named after the song who lives up the second floor who is a victim of child abuse. As much as he wants someone to help him, he is afraid that he'll get hurt even more. He just takes the abuse without protest, hoping that the agony would end quick. He keeps everything to himself and hopes things won't get any worse, but in reality, he's desperate for salvation, otherwise, he wouldn't have mention these things to the listener. This song describes child abuse in a nutshell.

Personally, I can be very strict, but not abusive. A child abuser hurts other children just to get their frustrations off or they do to their children what things they went through themselves. I don't claim to be an expert, but people who are like that need to get help or should be locked up because what they're doing is wrong. It's a tragedy if a child dies because of people like these because it's no child deserves to put under this painful experience and even if they survive it, they might become child abusers themselves. Though there are now many laws that are being enforced and more action groups formed to combat this problem, hopefully more can be done to eridicate this kind of behavior for the sake of the children.

From Wanderer's Song To An Empty Gas Tank: Running On Empty By Jackson Brown

Boy things sure are bad these days and it looks like it's going to get worse. Oil prices are skyrocketing and so are prices. Tightening belts can be seen everywhere as people struggle to make ends meet. I guess this is one of those dark periods where no one is spared. Ask everyone how things are and you get the same answer: Things are bad and we're trying to get by. Still, that doesn't mean that we should just lie down and die, keep on moving and keep on fighting should our motto. With the current situation that we have ourselves in, I hear "Running On Empty" by Jackson Brown playing in my head.

Back then, this was a good cruise song where you step on the gas and enjoy the song as you speed on down the road. Life was so much simpler then, where people can go where they wanted to go with just a few resources. Nowadays with so many problems, when I listen to this song it now means stretching the budget. Thanks to the current situation, what was once a song that represented a free-spirit now literally translates into running out of gas. Everyday day reminds me of it.

Still, every generation has its share of hardships. Despite the difficulties, I hope people remember that our ancestors were able to weather the storm literally. They still believed and they persevered even though the means they had were simple and the odds were against thenm. Hopefully, we can do the same. And when we pull through, I hope this song goes back to being representation of being free rather than an empty tank of gas.

Only God Knows Why: Slip Sliding Away By Simon And Garfunkel

Whether I'm at work or at home, my mind is being riddled with questions and I feel the stress affecting me everyday. After another long terrible period, I can't help but fear that I'm reliving my life in the same way as I have in the past. I try hard and do what I can not to repeat the mistake that got me into trouble and place me at the bottom of the barrel. Right now, things are not okay around here. I don't want to mention why because it's too personal and painful to mention it. Some people say you can't fight fate and if I don't make changes in my life my worst fears will be realized: getting into another long and terrible cycle of ups and downs with more downs than ups. When those feelings of dread creep up to me, I remember the song "Slip Sliding Away" by Simon And Garfunkel.

I can relate with every part about this song: a martyred husband; an unfulfilled wife; an absentee father and asking God why? When people depend on you too much to the point of feeding on you, it really feels that you are wasting away. When you think of things that might have been all the time, you really know you got problems. Not being able to be with people you care about can really break your heart. Sure we go about our chores and duties everyday, but at the back of our heads we ask the Almighty "What's The Plan?" when we wonder why things keep going that way.

Right now things are tough on everybody and I'm feeling all of the above. I don't want to complain because there's a difference between whining and letting it out. What I want to do find a way out of this funk. I know there's got to be a solution to this and I hope I find it fast. I want to change my life not only for myself but for my family as well. I just God listens and meets me half way cause despite the wrong decisions or indecisions, I'm trying because I don't want to experience that anymore because it'll be the end of me if I do.

Cool Love Song/Sailing Video: What Am I Gonna Do By Rod Stewart

Right now it's obvious that summer is over because this morning I left for work and it started pouring and now I just came and some parts of my shirt and pants are wet. I don't know if it's getting wet or because rain is so depressing that I suddenly remembered a good feel good song back in high school. As I've mentioned before, I'm not a beach person, but when I heard this song and saw the video, it made me feel so good that I was hooked to it. I only saw and heard this song once and many times in my life that I wanted to hear it again. The song is by Rod Stewart and is called "What Am I Gonna Do" which was released in 1983.

The song is your typical love-at-first-sight scenario where the smitten guy is trying to figure out how to win the girl. He's already at the point of begging for the girl to say yes to him. What really got me was the tune of the song which is very catchy and makes you want to move with the beat. Although the video doesn't describe the song, it's my idea of cruising the waves on a large ship. Listening to a band jaming and diving into the ocean, what more can you ask to enjoy the waves.

I just realized that I haven't heard this song song in 25 years. During that time I kept wondering when I'll hear this song again. It was only three days ago that I heard this song again and saw the video. This is one of the reasons why I love the new developments in technology because you get to find things that you are looking for, especially on the internet. This is one cool song that I've finally found again thanks to the net.

A Song For A Sentimental Fool: What A Fool Believes By The Doobie Brothers

Personally I have nothing against love because it's what makes the world go round and if there was alot more of it, we wouldn't have that many problems. My only problem with this emotion is that it leaves a person very vurnarable as well as naive. When you put those two characteristics together and have you got: A fool, a very sentimental fool. When love gets hold of you, don't be surprise if people look at you differently when you start fumbling your way day iin and day out. Whenever I listen to The Doobie Brother's song "What A Fool Believes", this thought always enters my mind.

Actually, this was the first D.B. song that I heard and I first saw it being played live by the band during the Grammy Awards where Kenny Rodgers was the host. It was one of the best G.A. that I watched because there were a lot of good bands who performed during that time. I was totally blown away by Micheal MacDonald's voice when they performed. I guess is that thing song talks about people being easily fooled in a bad relationship and how they refuse to see the reality of what's happening. I guess people like that really are fools.

I guess this is the reason why I'm really wary of love. I remember reading an article regarding men's attitudes towards this emotion. Right now, I guess I fall under the category of those who want to be hurt by love as well as those who are content with the love and support of friends and family. With the way things are, I don't want to get into anything really deep and serious because there are a lot of things that I have to sort out. What is important that no matter what the form, love still has a place in the world and that everyone remembers that.

A Song For Day Dreamers and Escapists : Shadows Of The Night By Pat Benatar

Whenever I think of the novel Don Quixote, I can't blame the old man in that book for wanting to go out and become a Knight. When life loses it's meaning and you're caught in a monotonous colorless existence, it can really put a strain on your sanity. For those of us who bear such a monotonous and boring routine, there are times when we wish things were different and life was not what is but what we planned it to be. Hopefully, one day and with hard work and smart decisions, we can pull it off before we become Don Quixotes ourselves. The song "Shadows Of The Night" by Pat Benatar reminds me that there are a lot of daydreamers and escapists out there who feel the same way.

When I hear the part about about taking her and everything will be all right, I really wish it was so. Call it a weakness, but I have to admit many times when the ends, I breathe a heavy sigh and it's not about relief. The video is a good match for the song which features Pat working on an assemblyline during WWII. She dreams of a more action-packed life as a pilot who infiltrates the Germans; fights them in the air and blows up their fortress. This dream suddenly ends and she goes back to her boring routine at the factory. I'm not surprised that many of us feel the same way.

To be fair though, we are partly to blame if we feel this sense of unfullfillment. One hard lesson some of my brothers lectured me was that if you want something, you have to go all the way to attain it. I guess I didn't try hard enough and I fell short. As a result, I just make do with what's left. Still, I believe in another life lesson: While there's life, there's hope. So while I'm still on this earth, I still work hard to attain my dreams and not be limited to a daydreamer living inside his head.

Switch On The TV'Turn Up The Radio: Turn It On Again By Genesis

This last two weeks really suck for me. I felt like I was playing Genie at work by trying to conjure up old documents and photos as well as trying to find something to publish. When I get home from work, I can't even relax because there's always something that needs to be done which is really taking it's toll on me. Times like these I either turn on the radio or find something to watch on the tube to chill out, but even that doesn't work. When I was younger, it was enough because things were simpler just like the song "Turn It On Again" by Genesis.

Just like the song, a little music or a good show was enough to calm my nerves when things gets too much. I liked this song when I first heard it when I was First Year High School and it during my bleak periods when things were not going well. And just like the song, I was also down on my luck that time. The drumplay in this song is really awesome cause expresses the singer's frustration very well. Sometimes when you feel alone, T.V. shows and radio songs were the only things that kept you company.

Right now I guess I really piss while I'm writing this entry on my blog. I'm tired and worn out from the endless hassles that I've been experiencing these past two weeks. I guess this song because it reminds of the times when I had some time and space to chill out. Nowadays, such periods are on the verge of becoming extinct. As I end this entry, I'll to chill out abit and hopefully, the people in my life can lay off a little.

Date/Reminisce Song: Cool Night By Paul Davis

After more than 20 yrs., whenever I listen to Paul Davis'song "65 Love Affair", I still get overwhelmed by feelings of the good times that I experienced in the past which comes alive and takes away the stress of the present. That's the reason why I never get tired of hearing it on 24k. I didn't realize that he performed another 24k song that I also liked. Though it's more of a romantic/date song, it also talks about nostalgia which is the essence of 24k. The song is called "Cool Night" and is now included in my list of 24k favorites.

The song describes an invitation to spend a quiet evening with a special someone. It has all the elements date song with the firelight and memories of the good life really give that "cozy feeling" when things get rolling. This song also takes you to that special place where everything is just pure heaven that you just don't want to leave. I bet who ever got "invited" felt right and didn't go when they heard this song. This is one of timeless songs that never gets overplayed, especially when you're on a date and slow dancing with your partner.

If it's not for a date, I say it's a good chill out when the day is over and it's time to relax. As always, I'd probably light up a cigar and open a beer or some whisky while I listen to this song. Like 24k songs, I just close and let the song carry me through the night. I miss songs like these and I feel sad when I remember the news about Paul's death. Again, thanks for the cool song Paul and I'll do what I can to keep it alive.

Always Be Inspired: Keep The Fire Burning Bright By Kenny Loggins

Fire can mean a lot of things for many people. For some it can be destruction, but for others, it can mean hope and well as inspiration. They when one is inspired by an idea or a goal, he should hold on to it until he fulfills it. He should never loose sight of it and never be destracted by anything or anyone because if it feels, right, go for it. This concept gets reinforced to me whenever I listen to "Keep The Fire Burning Bright" by Kenny Loggins.

I like the way the song starts with a very high note, which really sends a powerful message to the listener. In some instances, the song speaks of passion, especially when one is on date and during that situation, you really need to keep it burning bright. Another thing I like about the song is when the notes go higher and higher. The higher the song goes, the more inspired you become. It starts strong and finishes strong.

I never get tired of this song and everytime I get the chance, I request this song on Rt. Like a lot of Rt songs, it reminds me of the good times and more importantly, it reminds of not to loose track of the things I hold dear to me. Everytime I hear it, it makes me want to move mountains and like Rodger Daltrey's "Quicksilver", it's a good song to start the morning. Like a lot of good 24k songs, it really makes me feel alive every Friday which is why it's one of my favorites.

Dark Charmer: King Of Dreams By Deep Purple

Deep Purple is one of the most famous rock bands in the world. They rank up there with Led Zeppelin, Black Sabath and other rock legends that have produced some of the best rock songs of all time. While they are more famous for such classic hits like "Smoke On The Water" and "HighWay Star", I'm writing about another song. Some of you out there would probably protest and I don't blame you, but the reason I'm doing this is because this song was kept alive by RT's 24k program and it's a rare hit. This is the first 90's song that I'll be writing about and it's called "King Of Dreams".

The song describes every parents worst nightmare: Tall, dark strangers seducing their daughters at their favorite hangout. In the video, it was in an amusement park where the said character seduces the girl and takes her for nomerous rides and mysteriously disappears in the dark after jump of the rollercoaster. I guess it speaks alot about those smooth talkers. Though this song was in the 90's it had an 80's beat that I still very much fond of and I guess that's the reason why 24k kept this song alive. It was only recently that I learned about this when I surfed for the songs album called "Servants And Masters".

When Joe Lynn Turner signed with the band, the fans had mixed reactions about the change. While some liked it, purists didnot and this led to his being dropped from the group which I just read from wikipedia. I don't know about the others, but I like Turner's vocals. Though I have to admit that even though I liked the song, I was surprised that this was performed by Deep Purple. Bevertheless, it was a good song and they should give the man some credit for making something different and original rather than trying to copy the original which is worst.

Getting That Old Feeling Back: Feel It Again by Honeymoon Suite

I know it's getting monotonous but I think I've writing a lot about breaking up or getting dumped in a relationship as well as the terrible hurt that one feels because of it.  Be that as it may, for the lucky some, it doesn't last that long because just when they think it's hopeless, they find someone better.  When that happens, the feeling that you've lost comes back a whole lot stronger.  I really proves Bergson's Shipwreck Theory correct.  Whenever I hear Honeymoon Suite's song "Feel It Again", I really appreciate that lesson.The song is about regaining that feeling that one lost when things fall apart.  I'm no romantic but when the heart starts to mend, it really feels good inside.  This song really got to me the first time, I heard it with it loud guitars and powerful vocals, it really hits the heart.  The bands of the 80's were masters of this which is why I miss the 80's rock genre alot.  This song has something for both rockers and romantics, alike and you don't get that anymore today.

Whenever I hear this song, for some reason it fills me with hope.  It's like discovering a precious treasure that you've lost for a long time and is overjoyed at process.  Very few of the DJs during the last days of RT knew about this song and it's one of the measuring sticks that I use to test how much he or she knew about the music the station played during my time.  Anyone who knew the song and played during 24k got my deepest respect, especially now that it no longer gets any air time.  As for romance, yeah I get a bit sentimental too cause it reminds of the good times in my life like 24k always does during those magical Friday nights.

Psychedelic Lullaby: Dream Weaver By Gary Wright

It's incredible how a lot of the songs of 24k take me back to happier times when things were simpler and responsibilities were less complicated. Not a day goes by when I don't long for the return of the 24k program. Many times I would try to listen to it from 6:00am Friday to 6:00am Saturday just to savor all the good music from the past. If my body fails to keep up with the program at night, I feel good knowing that I'll be sleeping with my favorite songs I enter the dream realm. My favorite 24k song for that point when I feel sleep overcoming me would be "Dream Weaver" by Gary Wright.

Like all 24k songs, it really takes me away from the harsh realities of everyday life. If the Sand Man was real, this would probably be his signature song. Apart from a song about dreams, you could also say it's a song for an escapist who wished he were somewhere else. When I hear this song, I literally feel that my soul leaves my body to go to places where I can forget all the crap that I have experienced during the day. This song has pschedelic written all over it. Since it was played during the 70's, I'm not surprised since there was still alot of that going around.

Whenever I listen to this song, I wish there was such a thing as Dream Weaver train. I wouldn't think twice about boarding such transport if it's everything that the song said it is. If it will really take me to places I've always dreamed off, I don't know if I can ever get off. Sadly, I haven't such a ride, nevertheless, I this song is the next best thing. Enjoying a little "fat one" while listening to it is highly recomended.

Bittersweet Old Love: Kayleigh By Marillion

One thing about being single is that you often think about the relationships that never came to be.  Once in a while, memories of those relationships enter my head and I found myself being flooded with different feelings all at once.  This is true whenever I found myself alone on the weekend with a cigar in one hand and a beer in the other.  When the sky slowly turns dark, the intensity of those emotions grow stronger.  One such that can trigger a reaction in me was performed by the band Marillion called "Kayleigh".Just like a lot of 24k songs, it describes a love from the past that didn't end happily ever after. Instead, it ended with each accusing the other of breaking his/her heart which led to the relationship's end.  Years later, he still remembers the sweetness of the relationship by describing the places they've been to and the things they did together which had a special meaning for them.  Now that she has someone new, it makes the memories of what they had even more bittersweet.  It really hurts when a relationship that you thought would last forever comes to a bad end.I guess among the five of us, I'm the most unlucky when it comes to relationships.  Right now I'd rather be single so that I can attend to the needs of my family and I'm doing the best that I can.  I have so much to think about that relationships are out of my prioirities.  Nevertheless, I have to admit that sometimes it hits me when the memories come back bacause I feel like I somehow missed out on something.  I guess that's why they are so bittersweet.

Renewal Of Faith: Sanctify Yourself By Simple Minds

I'm no saint, but I have to admit there are times when going to Church does me some good. Times when I'm in doubt or when I'm sad, the Good Lord always manages to lift me up. Whenever things are a bit depressing, Church and prayer really heal the soul and provide us with energy to face the days trials. Even the most jaded person would soon find himself in church or at prayer to find answers and renewed strength when things get too complicated or too harsh. At times like this Simple Mind's song "Sanctify Yourself" is a really good reason to go to Church.

Although I'm not really a fan of this group, everytime I hear this song, I feel the need to do just that. It's like a new wave/techno gospel song which makes you want to sing along and wash away all the pain. Even if it's not about Church, it's also about renewal or trying to find new strength and new hope when things bear down on you. Just like Billy Joel's "Second Wind", it's a very uplifting song that I thank 24k for playing. My brothers would probably tease me again for posting this, but right now anything that makes you feel good is nothing to be ashamed of.

Though I'm still a little bit feeling down-in-the-dumps, I think I better take my own advice and find a some way renew and sanctify myself. Even though my schedule is tight and my resources are low, I know when it's time to sit down and reflect as well as pray. Hopefully when I find the time, I'll be able to clear my head and renew my faith. Times like this, I think people are like cars. Even person, like a car, needs a good tune-up every now and then.

Good Times And Bad Times: Fire And Rain By James Taylor

Just Yesterday, I was writing about love being able to move any obstacless with
Nicolette Larson's song "Lotta Love", but today I find myself down in the dumps again. Everytime I think about it, my life's like a sick-carousel ride that keeps going around in a vicious circle. The worst part about it is that there's too much of the bad times and too little of the good. These days I wake up and sleep with worry of everything that's happening in my life and stess is starting to get to me. Whenever I listen to "Fire and Rain" by James Taylor, I get a reminder of the bad times in the past and present, but at the same I get a sense of hope that it all will come to pass.

With the my life's been going, this song describes me very well, especially when he talks about sunny days and lonely times. The part that really gets to me is when he ask Lord Jesus for help at his desperate hour of need. I can really relate to that because many times I had that unfortunate episode where things come crashing and there was no one came there to help. The part about the news about people who were gone reminded me of two important people who are no longer in this world. I did what I could but I guess it was just their time;nevertheless, it still hurts to this day.

Whenever I pray, I always mention some of the lyrics of this song, especially about askihng for help to make a stand. These days, everthing and everyone who is important to me remains deep in thoughts as I go through my chores and duties. I know you should always look forward to the future but sometimes the wounds of the past take time to heal. Still, life goes on and we should always to tomorrow as a new opportunity. Always despite the bad times, there will always be good times too and never forget that.

Love As An Agent Of Change: Lotta Love By Nicolette Larson

I remember what Dennis Quaid's character in the movie DOA said about knowing what it feels like to be successful. It's not about money or fame but dedication to your work. The sign of dedication is that one truly loves what he or she is doing. I agree a lot about that statement and I know that when one loves his or her work or the source of their energy comes from the love that they have for what they are doing, they can accomplish anything. Saying that, reminds me of the song "Lotta Love" by Nicolette Larson which is one of my favorites of all time.

Originally written by Neil Young, she made this song her own and nobody sings it better than her. During the final years, of RT, songs from the 60s and 70s were getting less and less air time. This song was one of the few that were still being played. Hearing the combination of flute and saxophone combined with Nicolette's voice, really grabs you by the heart keeps your ear literally glued to the radio. This is one of those "drop-everything-that-you're doing" songs because it is so good to hear when it plays on the radio.

Some people ask me why I started this blog and why I spend everyday of the week writing about my favorite songs on that program. The answer is that it really is a labor of love. I loved the program and the songs that took me back to the days of my youth, I wanted to share with everyone all the songs that I loved listening to. They say when something you love disappears, doesn't mean the feeling for that thing disappears entirely. The same can be said about why I write about my favorite songs on this blog because it's out of love for the old music which holds so much good memories that made life wonderful for me and it is that same love why I had the courage to write about it online and share it with everyone.

Nicolette Larson - Lotta Love
by Electric_Eye

Closet Feel Good Song: Lifeline By Spandau Ballet

I'm going to get it from my brothers again if they see this post. Back then, I listened to music that went against the norm of my batch. Mostly rock, folk, blues and metal were the tunes that I belt out on my radio when I turned it on. New Wave, Techno and Hip-Hop tunes were definitely out of my list. When I started out in College, all my favorite rock bands and stations died out of the airways and I spent alot of the time switching the radio knob back and forth for a good station that played my songs. Along the way I kept hearing the song "Lifeline" by Spandau Ballet which was definitely not on my playlists of tunes; nevertheless, for some reason I felt good about listening to this song.

When I see all the depressing developments happening in the world today, I have to admit this song lifts my spirits when I hear it. For me, it's all about living life to the fullest. When I see the video, the red line traveling through the telephone polls makes me think about how connected we all are and how great it is that we are all somehow connected to one another. The best part is when we all make that connection which makes life all the more beautiful. Another thing about this song that I like is the infectious tune, which tells you that something is happening and it invites you to be apart of it. Lastly, one of my best buds liked the song, so told myself why not.

I'm surprised that they don't air this song that often. When I think of the hard times we are in today, songs like these are food for the soul. When I say that, I mean that it's a real morale booster that helps you forget about the bad things that are going on. I really must be getting old because when I was younger, admitting you like something that was against the your social orientation was very difficult to do. Well I guess you can say that this is one of my "Closet Feel Good Songs" because for some reason I feel good when I hear it.