A blogsite dedicated to 99.5 rt's 24k program which plays the best songs from the 60's, 70's, 80's and 90's!!! I use these songs to reflect my views on life as well as the memories of the past.
Just when I thought I was already stressed out from everything that's been happening around here, I get hit with another bomb. Just when stress thermometer was going down, it suddenly shot up again, driving me into panic mode. Then I stop myself and try to get it together. I remember that no matter nasty the things life throws at you get, chill out then work it out. I have to John Lee Hooker (together with Carlos Santana) for his song "Chill Out" for reminding me of that.
A long time ago, I stayed positive no matter what life threw at me. I always remained positive but these days, I feel at I am at the edge. At the back of my head, a voice is to hold on.. Dear God, I am trying my best. It isn't easy cause life is throwing everything at me including the kitchen sink.
They say that there isn't a problem that the Good Lord won't give you that you can't handle. All I know is that I am doing the best that I can. The problems keep pouring in and I try to handle it but it sure is tough. I just hope that the solution won't be far away. Till then, I'll just chill.
Well it rain hard last night and the window wiper broke down. It was good thing we were still able to make it back home despite the heavy downpour. Still, I feel a little down that this summer brought out a lot of heat and everything we worked so hard for fell apart. I wish things could've been different so we could have at least enjoyed the remaining days of summer. One that I would've listened to if things were different would be George Benson's "Breezin".
If things were different, we would have been celebrating like crazy. A week off to some outing would have been the icing on the cake. Watching the sun while relaxing in some shady place taking comfort down south. Man, we were so excited because it was within our grasp. Sadly, fate dealt a different hand and before we knew it, things went up in smoke. I guess all that I got left is this song which I was listening to last night to get the stress out before I went to bed.
Right now I am still weighing my options as well as trying to ensure that things keep on going. It's no fun sleeping and waking up with pressure on you everyday. I just pray that things get better and that I make the right choice when the time comes. Right now I am listening to this song to relax and as well as dwell on what the summer could have been. I just wish we could have enjoyed this summer rather than be apprehensive till June.
Well I feel that another era is about to end and now I suddenly find myself at another crossroads of my life. I've been in this situation before not once but twice. It was really due to the choices I made or didn't make. Now that I've been put in this position again, I really need to think things thoroughly. I just hope I do it right this time around. As I write this post, I am listening to Aimee Mann's song "Wise Up".
I feel like I've been trying to get it right for a long time. I still the pain from making the wrong decisions and I still remember what I through because if it. This time around, other as well as me are in the spot because of a cruel twist of fate. Apart from that, I've been getting a lot of suggestions as to what I should do. Well I am no trying to be practical as to how I make my decision. Being sentimental got me nowhere last time.
Right now I'm trying to chill just to get some peace of mind. I haven't had any for a long time now. Apart from that, I am also trying to find a way to make money online as a means of additional income. I haven't been doing very well at that either but I keep on trying. In between pauses, I am looking outside the house while listening to this song. Here's hoping that I wise this time around.
One of the worst nightmare's I've every had was when I was dreaming I was in my grandfather's room and it was dark. Suddenly it got darker and it took over the whole room and I felt the darkness sucking me in and I was calling out for help. Next thing I knew I woke up in beads of sweat despite the fact that the air condition was on. It was one of those bad dreams that you won't forget. That's just one of the reasons why I am using the song "I See Darkness" by Johnny Cash for this post.
Apart from that bad dream, another reason why I started listening to this song was because of these black years that have brought me nothing but bad news. Just when things look all sunny, the darkness comes out nowhere and casts a dark shadows. Even when times where great, there was no escaping it. It's a if you had too much of a good time and now it's time to bear the hardships. Ever since 2000, not a year goes by without that darkness casting itself here.
Right now I'm just trying to get by as the darkness starts to spread itself in each year. Even when you try to prepare yourself, it just hits you and hits you hard. If there's a wish that I want granted is that this bad cloud be expunged from me. Till then, I have no choice but to accept the unacceptable. It's downer but then again that's life.
Back in the day when you didn't cable to watch good shows, one my favorite comedy programs was M.A.S..H. It was adapted from the 70's movie about medics in the Korean War and how they cope with the pressures of war and taking care of the wounded. A lot of times they poke fun at the higher ups as their way of expressing their resentment about this war. every episode always made me laugh. Apart from the good script where I always find myself laughing at every episode, I also liked the opening song. The title was called "Suicide Is Painless".
Why did I remember this song all of a sudden? Apart from being a good song to listen to. I guess dwelling on my current situation made me remember it again. Don't get me wrong. I'm not contemplating on the suicide or anything rash. I am against suicide but to admit I am still frustrated not at what's happened but also because I find myself at another situation where I am placed in a state of uncertainty. I have to admit it lets the air out of me.
As I said earlier, one thing I won't do is the suicide part. If I do that, I'd give in to the pressures and thus have lost. I don't want someone talking down my grave and saying "You didn't have the guts to keep on going". Still, right now I really feel down about how things are going. I just hope that I turn things around while I still can.
Man, I'm still feeling down about what happened this last two weeks and a lot of people still feel the same way. Apart from that, I'm also stressed out about other developments that are still giving me a headache, Seems like life doesn't want to give me a break and that's why I am in a sullen and annoyed mood right now. What I'd give for a little time out to just to forget about this for even a moment. Wishing for a precious moment where I can just forget about all this reminds me of the song "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd.
Whether it's a herb or a brew or both, I could sure use it right now. Nothing's going right and life always making me accept crap and I'm sick of it. Right now as I listen to this song, part of me wants to escape somewhere to just get away from it all. It has to be a place where I feel good and of my own choosing. If not, I won't feel good and it'll be just like being dragged to some awful place where I to pretend I like it only to feel sick deep inside.
Sometime no matter how well we carry ourselves despite life's pressures, there are times we need to get away. i'm already missing the "two-butts" sessions where we would wind down and get to know each other as well as have fun. This is a very bleak future I face. That's why I long for those precious moments where you can escape reality even if it's only for a moment. It helps you face life once you get a grip even when your comfortably at bliss just like this song.
It's been two weeks since the bomb was dropped and I still have that shock in my system. This week I had a hard time trying to keep my bum mood in check. As annoyed as I am, I make it a point not to spread it around cause everyone else would also feel bad. Glad it's the weekend and right now I am trying to think happy thoughts to give me some comfort. One song that I'm listening to just to get some cheer into my soul is Lee Ritenour's "Dream Walking".
I've been going up and down Youtube to find this gem because every time I hear it, it calms me down along with my other 24K tunes. When I hear this song play, it takes me to a special place where I can be at peace. Either the beach during the sunset with drink in my hand and fine lady at my side or at some classy joint enjoying fine dining with your dream companion. As I listen, relaxation starts to set in and even for a moment, a smile appears on my face. That's how good this song is when you want to relax.
Sadly reality will once again come knocking at my door and I will deal with the cold hard facts regarding the hand that I was dealt with. Well that's life and there's no escaping the crap it throws at you. All I can do is consider my options and I hope I chose the right one this time. Until then I'll just listen to this song and other tunes like it to help me through this storm. Just brave the situation and think happy thoughts no matter how hard it gets.
