Monday, May 26, 2008

Reflecting On One's Self: Still Crazy By Paul Simon



In my last entry, I reflected on the many actions and decisions that have changed my life over the years. Though I'm not one to regret what I have and have not done, I'll admit not a day goes by when sometimes I find myself I had done things differently. That feeling gets heightened during times when I bumped into some of my old classmates from high school, some of them successful, some getting by and others who are on a slump. Whenever we accidentally see each other either time freezes or I realize just how many years has past. We chat for a few precious minutes and with great difficulty, we part ways which leaves me in deep thought about what were I am and where I'm going just like Paul Simon's " Still Crazy".

Bumping into people that you haven't seen in a long time, really takes the years off you and you just want to drop everything to share a beer and talk of the good times that not only you and your friend shared, but also reminisce about your batch mates. Sometimes the meeting gets really intense if that person was important to you during the days of your youth. Even if it was brief, you wish that you could have chatted just a little longer but commitments can’t wait and it’s time to go. As you end the day, the meeting leaves you evaluating about yourself as well as feeling sentimental wondering where do you go from here. The longer you think, the deeper the question gets as wonder what life has in store for you next.

I guess this is the reason why I’m not one to go to reunions because when I see them all again, I’ll probably be overwhelmed by emotion. When I think about how far I’ve come in life, I know I still have not lived up to my potential and sometimes that keeps me awake at nights. I guess that’s the reason why up to this day I often wake up early only gaze at the sky as the night ends and the day begins. Just like the song, I’m not that much for socializing, though I admit I can be a fool for some songs that I listen, especially during 24k. I still have a lot to do and I know I got to start moving and I hope that I won’t be convicted by a jury of my peers as I try to put my life into order.

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