Every time I remember my father's passing, it still hurts me deep inside. I'd give anything to hear his morning rants about coffee or creamers just to know that he's there. Still, I know I am not the only affected by this as my brothers and my mother still mourn his death as well. It hurts even more when I see my mother cry, I feel like crying too. It takes a piece out of my heart when that happens. When I hear the Outfield's song "I Cry Just A Little Bit", it reflects what I feel when I see her grieve for my father.
As I have said before, you never know how much a person means to you until they are gone. Whenever she wakes up early in the morning, I know the loss hits her again. It gets worse during Sundays because that's the day they spend a lot of time together. The best I can do when that happens is let her cry and be by her side till she gets it out of her system. It's hard seeing her like this but join her and try to console because like her I too miss him very much.
Still, I'll be there for as long as it takes because she's my mother and she was there for me when I needed her. It's my turn to give comfort as she has comforted me when I was a boy. It's tough but I know he's up there playing all the 18 holes in God's big golf courses with my granddad as well as my nanny. For now, I'll do my best to keep her from crying cause when she cries, I cry too.
No comments:
Post a Comment